Let's start at the bottom of the glory hole and work our way up, shall we?
The Juggernauts were very "jug-like" all season as the just sadly hung low, teets scraping the bottom of the barrel. At some point during the season they perked up enough to ship off Dan Uggla to the eventual champ, Cleveland Steamers, but they were never any real threat to give a gal two black guys. I mean, black eyes.
The lone Highlight for the Alabama Hot Pockets came during the draft when Dick Marshall had to step in for the manager and perform GM duties. Also, maybe there was a trade? I know he went through all his waiver dough.
Imagination was all the Pretenders had going for themselves as they somehow managed an eighth place finish, only a point behind Jim Hendry Blows.
Much like their namesake, Jim Hendry Blows. And a joke about being fired but still working for another month.
Charlie Sheen Team. A respectable finish for a team that only had a 1-2 punch pitching staff and a part-time manager. But will ol' Shawn Miah return for another go in 2012?
Key trades helped The leprechongs and North Side Shit Turds(NSST) finish in the top half of the standings, despite poor starts. Dean's man love obsession with all things Votto and Kershaw may have blinded his drafting. Eventually it all came together and he earned a 4th place finish once he traded Michael Bourn for Carlos Pena and took his head out of his ass.
NSST made a keen decision to keep Aubrey Huff for a dollar, drop him for James Loney, drop him for Aubrey Huff, and then drop Huff again for some other trash. Let us not forget three key moves made by NSST when he flipped Pena for Bourn, Cole Hamels for Ryan Zimmerman, and Andre Ethier for Ryan Roberts and Logan Morrison.
Whiskey Chuggers were strong all season and finished with a tie for third with NSST. Down 1.5 points going into the last day of the season, The Chuggers evened the mark to finish in the money. Good Job.
No More Power had the perfect set-up with keeping Buster Posey and Carlos Gonzalez. It wouldn't help however, as NMP had to overcome an early season ending injury to Posey and reduced power numbers from Carlos. In the end, NMP had to settle for second. Still, an excellent season.
And finally, congrats to our champions, the Cleveland Steamers. It may have been a twelve point victory but you where biting your nails for the entire month of September. Perhaps it could have been less stressful had you not been parting in copulation or coitus all summer long. But in the end, you came out a champion in more ways then one and now you can use your winnings to buy diapers. Congratulations.
Good work to all who stayed active this season. But we need more smack talk. I think we need Corey Dale Conrad Camden!!! Yes We Can! Make it happen. 2012!
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